What a week

This all happened last week-

Monday- I was returning from a retreat in Colorado and was at ease about my hour and a half long flight back to Wichita. As we were preparing to land the pilot notified us that due to hail we could not land. Therfore we were going to wait in KC for the weather to clear. They let us off the plane into one of the gates at the KC airport. If you've ever been to the Kc airport you know that due to it's shape each gate has it's own security screening. That means once you're in the gate, you are stuck in the gate. So they let us off into a gate where there was no food or water and told us if we left the gate area we would risk losing our seat. A full plane of people locked in one area+ dinner time+no food/drinks=cranky

So we waited and waited. What was supposed to be 45 minutes turned into about 3.5 hours. At the end of the time they said that there was no way we'd go back to Wichita. That meant our options were flying back to Denver and flying to Wichita the next morning or staying in KC and flying from KC to Chicago to Denver to Wichita. Both meant finding your own hotel room with only a slight discount. I took option C: Call Ang and trav about 10:30 at night and stay at their house. So Trav picked me up and I slept on their couch. Mind you my bad was still on the plane going back to Denver. I stayed at their house until my Mom could come pick me up on Wednesday. Overall it was a good learning experience- this was the first time something like that had happened to me. And I managed to get $150 out of it for not taking their options, which none of the others who choose their own 'C' thought of. I even met a Jehovah's witness (who looked like Chandler Bing from Friends)!

Thursday- My great friend Ellen came by for a visit before summer gets crazy and she gets married (yay!). We drove to Wichita to shop and basically get out of Halstead. We were headed to dinner at a near by shopping plaza. I turned into the shopping plaza when I saw a car coming into my lane. I slammed on my breaks and reached a complete stop. All I could do was watch as this person slammed into the left side of my car. As the car approached I saw this person reaching into the back of her car, obviously not watching.

Once we crashed she got out of her car and starting yelling everyone's favorite F word. I felt bad for her because she didn't look like she was having the best day or life situation. Then she went back to her car and pulled out a baby from the back seat. She was baby sitting him. Turns our he was fussy and she was checking on him when the crash happened. The good news was the following: No body was injured. She was driving a bug which wasn't tall enough to hit my lights. Her insurance is covering all my repairs ( a new front bumper, a new tire).

After getting all the info Ellen and I went to dinner and had a lovely time. Then on the way home my tire seemed to be making a funny noise. We stopped in front of a car maintence center (it's open sign was on, but it was closed) to check it out. There was definitely some sort of bolt or screw in my tire. So Ellen and I, being the strong females we are (with Dads who teach their daughters this stuff) set out to change the tire. Praise the Lord I have full spare! We got the spare down but hit a snag when the jack would not come out of it's tiny compartment in the wall. Just then a man and his girlfriend pulled up to pick up her car. He offered to help and changed the tire in a matter of minutes. Though l was really thankful for his help, Ellen and I were a bit sad we didn't get to show off our skills.

Friday-Cold of death strikes in the evening. Extremely sore throat, head ache, exhaustion, sinus pressure, high fever. I went to bed at 10pm, which has not been my bed time in about three years. Thankfully it was short lived. I've been taking medicine like crazy though. I've been gargeling, shooting stuff up my nose, taking mucinex, and general cold medicine. I've also been taking naps.

It was a crazy week. God was faithful through the whole thing. I was dumped in a city that I knew pretty well and had family. My friend Ellen was able to help me keep calm and walk me through the process after the accident. The accident is no big deal-minimal damage, no cost to us, not hike in my insurance. The cold is almost gone!

Three cheers for life experience!

God is good!

God is good! Really, really good!
I just found this post that I had written in October and looking back I can see how God completely has led me through the entire process of going on an adventure with Him, even when I didn't realize it.
It's encouraging to see so many of my hearts longings answered so clearly (I'm sure God had a big part in putting those longings there).

If you know what my summer is like and want to know why I wrote what I did (see above)
Click here-Hungry for Adventure

Quick Update

School has been over for a week now!!!- Nate came home and we hung out at my house waiting for Saturday (see below). We practiced music, watched episodes of the TV show Arrested Development, cooked dinner, saw friends, made some fabulous watercolor creations, played softball, went for a bike ride, and played games with my parents.



Wedding!!!- Some of our best friends from school got married this weekend! Congrats to David and Whitney!!! We were honored as they chose us to lead worship and play some other music at their wedding. We had a great time! It was a beautiful wedding and was a lot of fun too!
Did I mention that I caught the bouquet and Nate caught the garter? We did. I don't have pictures of that, but Nate does, so I'll post them sometime.



















So now I'm at home. I've got a pretty good to-do list:
Un-pack from school
Throw away stuff I don't need (preparing to move in a month)
Start packing

A Psalm/Prayer

O God, my God, You are the God of
Death to life
Chains to freedom
Brokenness to healing
Guilt to forgiveness.
You are the God who brings breath to dry bones; hope to a people without hope.

Lord, come and bring Your divine exchange to my life.
Awaken things within me that have been sleeping.
Let me wipe away the dust of complacency from my eyes.
Rinse away that which tricks me into thinking I can't come close to you.
Instead give me urgency, vision, and boldness.

Breathe, breathe, breathe into me!
Fill me with Your breath of life.
Let hope saturate my blood and flow through my veins;
always multiplying and bringing life to dead and broken places.

O God, My God, You are the God of nothing into something;
Come and bring Your divine upside downs into my life.

I want to be awake and alive!!!

I'm smitten...well, more than that actually

I've been dating a wonderful, funny, talented man who loves Jesus (!!!) for almost 10 months now and yet some of you don't know anything about him because I don't write about him that much.

Well, I think it's time that I write about our relationship. I've held back in the past for several reasons:

No one wants to hear mushy relationship stuff all the time.

I'm not one of those people who stake their whole personality and life off of another person and wouldn't want to worry anyone.

I'm busy.

With that being said, here I go... complete with timeline appropriate photos.

First, here's some basic info about Nate:

He's a junior theatre major/ religion and philosophy minor who recently discovered his natural ability to interpret Greek and his love of Biblical studies. He's been a camp counselor tons! He's from Norco, CA. He plays drums and guitar. He's tall. He's awkward like me!

Nate and Sam: The Abridged Version

Nate and I had been close friends for two years before we started dating. We dated very briefly freshmen year (about 2 weeks) before I decided that the constant nauseous feeling I had was because I didn't have peace about being in this relationship. We broke up and I said, "I still want to be friends." Which was TRUE. I knew that though I couldn't be in a relationship with him that I had found a really great friend.

After about 2 days of post-break up awkwardness we couldn't handle it and forged ahead in our friendship.

From that point onward we had lots and lots of DTR's (the Sterling term for 'define the relationship'--this means going for a walk or sitting on park benches and talking about where each person is at and how they feel about the other person). Mostly they were caused by Nate really wanting to date me, me liking Nate but not liking Nate, me not wanting to be in a relationship, Nate respecting that, us remaining at our 'just friend' status. The DTR's varied between being hard, annoying, stressful, hilarious, and great.

God used that year and a half or so to draw us closer to Him and mature us. We also grew in our friendship.

In that time we:

Made up lots of inside jokes

Went on Choir tours together (see left: Nate and David-my two favorite guys. Enacting a scene from Baywatch in CA)

Won a swing dance competition

Played in praise band together

Had late night talks in the union

Hung out with my family

Hung out with our friends.

And just had fun!

And the best part is that the core of our relationship is our friendship. This past June we decided to date(there are so many different terms people use-courtship, dating, etc. I think the best way to explain it is that from the start we took our relationship seriously. We felt strongly that it could head towards marriage but still wanted to enjoy 'dating' and getting to know each other even more.) It was amazing to see how God prepared us to be in a deeper relationship with one another.

Nate is a huge blessing in my life. He is a confidant, someone who understands and shares my random sense of humor, and a wild man; he strives to be who God made him to be and won't be tamed by others.

Nate is also a great spiritual leader. He reminds me of the truth when I need to hear it. He prays for me and with me when I am discouraged. He constantly reminds me with his words and actions of God's love and mercy. I'm excited for whatever God has for us! As the famous line from the 80's said it, "The future is so bright, I've got to wear shades."

Here are some more pictures of us:

Personal Record

It's 5:23 in the morning. I just finished a paper for my doctrine class. I started it today.
I've never put off a paper this far in my life (record #1).
I've never stayed up this late doing homework (record #2).
I've never been this awake at 5:25 and I haven't even had caffeine (record #3).

Never has record breaking been so exhausting.

Praise the Lord for Spring Break in a few days!!!

Be informed

I get to vote this year and am trying to make the most of it. I'm still seeking out information on candidates and I strongly encourage you to do the same.

Check out these websites for more information:

www.glassbooth.org- Take quizes to find out which candidates you agree/disagree with and why.

www.rockthevote.com

Someone's listening to rap at work

I went online to check the weather forecast for tomorrow and this is what I found:

Tonight: Increasing clouds, turning windy and sharply colder. Some patchy freezing drizzle or snizzle overnight. Lo: 20 Wind: SW/NE 15-30
Tomorrow: A chance of mainly morning light freezing drizzle or snizzle. Otherwise, clouds break for some sun. Very windy and sharply colder! (Early morning high of 36.) Hi: 26 Wind: NE 20-40Tomorrow Night: Mostly cloudy with a bitter wind. A chance of a light wintry mix. Lo: 17 Wind: NE 10-20

Something new

Hey blog readers...whoever you may be!

I just added a new link to a website. My friend Molly and I posted this website to get the word out about our senior service project.

We're really excited about it but definitely need your prayer support!

We'll keep updating it as we get information.

Awake '08

Unattractive news: Kenya

For the last month or so there has been this incredible clash amongst two tribes in Kenya. It all started with an election that is thought to be rigged. People have been killed. Families have been displaced. Just last week the leaders of the two opposing parties have announced plans to work together for peace.
Kenya has been on my heart lately and this story had me upset today. It also upset me that this isn't seen as important. It isn't newsworthy. Since it isn't getting much coverage anywhere else I'm posting it here.

Kenya School attacked

Everything you see is a gift from God

This song is simple, child-like, and contains powerful truth. It's also catchy. It brings a smile to my face!

Life in your arms

This break has been really good. Relaxing. Reading. Journaling. Napping. Christmas shopping in a fun and yet efficient way. Seeing old and cherished friends.
Right now I am with my family. It has been great. I love catching up on what has happened and what is happening in people's lives. Things can change so drastically in just a few months. Often times spending time with family and catching up with people starts with getting aquainted with all the changes that have occured. It's a process of remembering who they are, figuring out the balance between who you know them to be and who you see before you, with changes, questions, new opinions, new wisdom. But it's also leaving them space, that amazing freedom, to keep growing and changing.
Right now I am sitting in my sister's house rocking my niece Zoey's chair thing with my foot. When I glance over we catch eyes. She smiles and coos at me. I love being able to carry her around and letting her fall asleep in my arms. It's amazing that I can hold this life in my arms. I can rock her and swing her. And it amazes me to think that I will see her grow up, from toddler-hood to mother-hood. And now, for this fleeting and thus precious, moment I can still hold her in my arms.
I think babies do this to people. They make them pause and wonder and marvel at life in their arms, and thier own lives flying past them too.
(Watch out people, I'm having an advent/christmas moment.)
I think this is part of the reason God loved the idea, the reality, and the implications of sending His son into the world. God enters the world in weak human flesh as Jesus. He's fully God and yet so obviously man. You could hold him, rock him, kiss his cheek, sing him a lullaby. And all the while you know, well...Mary, Joseph, and a handful of others knew or recognized, that they were holding Life in their arms. And later in His life you could eat a meal with him, you could put your arm around him and feel him sweat. And then he would go and raise the dead or heal the lame and blind, or calm the storm, and you knew he was God. Life right there with you, Life was your friend.
I'm so thankful for those chances that come along. Those chances to know that something marvelous and significant and once-in-a-lifetime is happeinging. The word in greek I think that fits so well here is Kairos. Kairos means-the perfect time, the fullness of time or as one of my professors has said, "that moment when earth's time and purpose intersects with God's time and purpose", it's when you feel that something holy, precious, and wonderful has happened.
I'm so glad that God has given me so many chances to slow down and recognize those Kairos moments, whether I'm holding Zoey or talking for hours on end with an old friend. I'm so thankful that God loves to interupt our lives, schedules, and thoughts just in time.

More funnies

Godzilla and Mothra-An Average Weekend

"What do you want to do this weekend?"

"I don't know. What do you want to do?"

"DESTROY THE CITY!!!"

For your viewing pleasure

Since I don't have much time to update these days (this is my last week of classes before finals) I've decided to post some cartoons I drew this summer. They are really random snapshots of how I often imagine things. That being said, you might think they don't make sense. No offense taken. I hope you enjoy them though!

This is called "Bear Attack"

"Once, twice, three times a she-bear"

"This guy had a lot of problems. Until tonight bear attacks wasn't one of them."

Nancy Kerrigan Halloween

More cartoons to come later

Is it Thanksgiving break yet?

I could really use a break.
Last weekend our small singing group, Highland Singers, went on a 4 day tour around eastern KS, mostly the Kansas City area. It was a great time and the best music tour experience I've had thus far. We became close as friends and became tight musically. It was a good tour, but we did miss two days of class and didn't have time to do homework. So I've been playing catch up this week. It's really a scramble sometimes.

This weekend I'm heading up to Kansas City again for our semi-annual trip to the International House of Prayer. I'm excited because a big group is going (25) and many have never been before. Also, I'm not in charge! That is a good feeling, especially when there is some sort of snag with the trip planning. I'm not being held responsible. It is also a hard feeling sometimes because I wish I could just take control and straighten it all out, or go back in time and help my friends (including my roommate and my boyfriend and another good friend) plan for all these snags about a month ago. It is times like this when I realize how much of a greedy power-monger I am. God is teaching me a lot about that. I'm excited for a slight break at one of my favorite places! I'm anticipating the work that God is going to do in these students lives. Some amazing things came out of our past trips.

That is all the updates you get for now.

I guess it is good that my degree is in youth ministry

St. Bernard of Clarivaux

Was an interesting cat. Right now (literally. I am 'taking a break' from my paper) I am writing a paper about his theological contributions. Here are a few quotes from him that I found particularly beautiful or interesting:

"I ask no further pledge of righteousness if he is one my side whom alone I have offended. If he decrees that a sin is not to be imputed to me, it is as if it never existed."

"You will not pray aright, if in your prayrs you seek anything but the Word, or seek him for the sake of anything but the Word; for in him are all things. In him is healing for your wounds, help in your need, resotration for your faults, resources for your further growth; in him is all that men should ask or desire, all they need, all that will profit them. There is no reason therefore to ask anything else of the Word, for he is all."

"Although the creature loves less, being a lesser being, yet if it loves with its whole heart nothing is lacking, for it has given all."

Hungry for adventure

I don't know what precisely is going on in my heart. It is a random, itching, "somethings about to happen", kind of feeling that rises up in me. The feeling is a hunger for adventure--to do soemthing meaningful, daring, maybe a little weird or stupid looking--for God. The condundrum is "What is God trying to tell me or show me? Where or to what is God leading me?".

I feel the need for a pilgramage. Getting out there--seeing a little bit of the world before the demands of adulthood come down on me--allowing God to take me way out of my comfort zone.

So far this pilgramage has been spiritual. God has been working on my heart intensely, with passion and jealousy for all of my love. Times have been tough, really tough at times. I've cried so much this semester it's nuts. Don't worry, I'm not depressed. It's actually an answer to prayer as I have asked God to soften my heart and to help me allow myself to feel, even when it hurts. I don't want a heart of stone! I've also had amazingly sweet and refreshing times in His presence. God is already taking me on an adventure as He calls me to join Him in what He is doing and where He is going, despite my fears and doubts. I'll have to write more about what God is doing in my heart. Remind me!

But, at the same time, I feel this stirring to go somewhere! I don't know where. I am still praying about it and seeing what God wants to do with my summer.
I don't know what it is. I think partly it's a desire for something different, partly a desire to be radically in love with God, and partly to be more independent and get away to something foreign to everyday life.

I just want this summer to be different. Every summer I end up feeling like my time could've been used better. Since I've gone to school my friends in town have all moved away and I feel isolated from my peers during the summer. I want to spend my time wisely, grow closer to God and be stretched in my faith, and get to know more people my age.

I'm checking out my options and praying about it. We'll see what happens.

Pray for the Middle East

Check out this article from the BBC Turkish MPs back attacks in Iraq.

Much needed rest

I'm headed home this weekend with several goals in mind:

• Get lots and lots and lots of homework done.- I have a feeling that next week, homecoming at Sterling, will be crazy. School doesn't stop during this week, but craziness grows exponentially as time to do things becomes more and more limited. And one of my professors chose to have a paper due that Thursday. Hopefully I will be able to work way, way ahead this weekend.
• Me time- I don't get a lot of that right now. Hopefully I will have more time to sleep, read for fun, take baths, play piano for fun, have more time to be with God, and other wonderful self-care type stuff.
• Be away from everyone and everything- That's how I handle stress. I remove myself from the situation or environment. I'm also introverted in a lot of ways so having time to not be around others and enjoy living in my head should be beneficial.
• I'm also reevaluating my current schedule-it turns out I don't have a lot of time for the things and people I love. My challenge is working around fixed times like classes, office hours, meetings, practices, and Bible studies.