Two weeks from today...

I'll be married! The countdown is almost over! I think we started at 200 something and now it is down to 14!
I have been keeping busy lately with tons of wedding details. It's coming together now and I can finally see what it will look like. I'm so excited!
I'm also really excited to see family and friends that I have not seen for awhile.

Continue to pray for us as things will probably pick up the pace.

Big Stuff

When I thought about graduating the thought of what else would be going on in my life never really occurred to me. I knew I'd be moving out on my own, looking for jobs, and that kind of thing. I never thought this much would be going on! It seems like the reality of what is about to happen just started really sinking in last weekend. Now, however, it feels a little surreal. Here is what is happening in my life right now:
Graduation-10 days
Wedding-38 days
Thailand Trip-8.5 weeks

A bit of exciting news! Nate and I have found jobs teaching overseas in Asia! Living overseas is never something we thought we'd be able to do for awhile, let alone right out of college. However, God is so amazingly good and has opened up a wonderful opportunity for us! Things are still not completely official, but it looks like we will go unless something crazy happens. If you would like to know more, please contact me personally. It's not top-secret or anything, I'm just trying to be careful with something that feels a delicate right now. And to think I worried so much!

Let Every Heart

I am counting down the days to Graduation and my wedding. Everyone says and knows that this semester is going to go fast and yet we are still surprised that, in fact, it is. This is a interesting time in my life, a strange and significant time where their is a natural tension between making decisions and waiting.

This last week in my alone time and time with God, this theme that had been recurring in my mind was finally made clear. For some time this theme was just lingering there, kind of like background music. This theme is "Prepare Him Room".

I know it is not longer advent season, but somehow the words "Let every heart prepare him room" seem to resonate with me. I guess I'm in some sort of advent season. It's a time of waiting that is not empty or static, but is filled with hope and is preparatory. I know that somehow there is a change coming in my relationship with God. I feel that the answer to my often frenzied schedule and desire to somehow be less busy (a.k.a in charge) is going to be answered. I know it may look different than I expect, but I know that advent means that Christ is coming.

After long years of praying, serving, leading, and letting those things run me down instead of filling me up, I desire to be closer to God and I know I need it. I really want Christ to be the center of my life. I have let other things grab my attention and keep it. I have taken on responsibilities that may be good but not the best fit for me. I have let my own pride and zeal, along with things I really do enjoy, call the shots of what I am involved in.

So here I am. Tired. Ready to move on. Needing some time to reflect and be restored. And I feel called to "prepare him room". I don't know exactly what that will look like. I guess I'll be trying to listen to God and act boldly as I hash that out with Him. But I'm also really encouraged. God will bring me to that most necessary place of rest, 'shalom', and restored relationship with Him.

Summer Plans

Hey guys,
My posts have been so exciting lately! Well, the posts may not be exciting, but the events that lead to the writing of the post are exciting.

First bit of news: Nate and I have set the date for our wedding: May 24th @ 5:00pm. We should send out some save-the-dates soon. We are getting married at Tanganyika Wildlife Park in Goddard (just southwest of Wichita). It is a really great place and we are excited to celebrate with family and friends there. Plus, we will have a lemur at the wedding! We are also planning on having a California Reception at some point for those that won't be able to make it out to Kansas for the wedding.

Second bit of news: Nate and I are going to Thailand!!! We are going with our school and are assistant team leaders for one of our friends and staff members at Sterling. We are going early/mid-July. We are not sure what exactly we will be doing over there. We have a couple of options: teaching English, doing teaching/evangelism in the northern rural areas, or working with girls in aftercare homes (sex-trafficking victims). We are both really exciting about this trip. As most of you who read my blog (family members) know, my cousins have been missionaries in Thailand for almost 9 years now. It has been a place that I have heard about as long as they have been there and I had always hoped to visit. The only sad thing is that they will probably be home on furlough while we are in Thailand! There will be more information about this coming out as well.

Other than those plans, Nate and I are just waiting on God for open doors and opportunities. That includes jobs and housing and the like. Pray for us!

"Flesh and Bone make my home"

That is one of my weirdest post titles ever! It connects though. You'll see.
I was reading through my old journal that encompasses most of the last school year. I found an entry that I really liked and thought I would share.

October 5th, 2007

So I did my Bible study last night (On the theme of Immanuel seen throughout the Bible) and it went well. The Bible study was about the temple Solomon built and how God had a promised, designated place for people to worship, sacrifice, pray and repent. We then talked about the new covenant implications found in 1 Corinthians 3:16-17:

"Do you not know that you are a temple of God

and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?

If any man destroys the temple of God,

God will destroy him, for the temple of

God is holy, and that is what you are."

The first thing is that we are a new temple. We don't need (or want!) a geographic location to go to if we need to pray, worship, repent, etc. God has found a new dwelling place inside every believer. What is so beautiful is that first, though God chose to not be boxed in to one geographic location, He chose to make His dwelling place, His temple, even in my walls of flesh. What is amazing is that, just like in Solomon's temple, God has made a promise to be there 24/7. There aren't visiting hours in this temple. It doesn't have vacation days.

What stuck out to me is that God chose to make His temple within the human frame. He is there, and we are still His temple, now matter what we feel. Whether we feel lost, doubting, ashamed, fantastic, on fire, so-so, persistent, or any other emotion He is there.

When God chose to build His temple this time, He chose not brick, stones, fancy tapestries, fine gold pieces, elaborate altars or lamp stands. He chose walls of flesh, altars of physical and emotional brokenness, the decoration of our uniquely made hearts, souls, minds, and spirits, and the worship, the songs of an in-process, renewed people.

He chose to make His dwelling place in the weak, broken, sinful, needy human frame.

He promised to hear, forgive, restore, show mercy, and accept sacrifice and praise and that is what He is doing.

"But will God indeed dwell with mankind on the earth? Behold, heaven and the highest heaven cannot contain You; how much less this house which I have built." 2 Chronicles 6:18

Tidbits from my mind: Culture Shock

Before I went on my trip this summer I read up on working in cross-cultural contexts. All of those books warned me about re-entry or reverse shock. Wikipedia describes reverse culture shock as:

" Returning to one's home culture after growing accustomed to a new one can produce the same effects as [culture shock experienced when entering a different culture] "

I was plenty prepared to experience culture shock going to Asia, but realized on the plane coming home that I wasn't as prepared coming home from Asia. So far it hasn't been too rocky but I have experienced many of the symptoms of reverse culture shock.

Here are a few things I've thought or experienced recently:

Choices: While I was shopping at Target, I was overwhelmed at my choices.

10 different kinds of Cat litter.

ailes full of different chips, coffees, candies, butter, cleaning solutions, frozen dinners.

I found myself thinking, "Why do we need so many choices!"

Waste- It is amazing how much food we throw away.

Immigrants: Americans treat immigrants (from any country), especially those in service-related industries, like they are sub-human.

Shopping: Those who know me know that I've never been a big shopper. The mall was never my favorite place. Now shopping trips of any kind have become guilt-trips. I go into clothing stores and see the labels say Made in 'insert any Asian country'. I've been there. I've met people like the people who sewed this garment/put together this table/assembled these shoes. Some of the kids I worked with could end up in factories sewing clothes for me. More than making me want to become someone who has their own garden and sews their own clothes, it has made me more aware of where my money is going and makes me question why my money should go there.

Crying: I am more sensitive to things. Every time a commerical about orphaned children who have to take care of their siblings at a young age comes on I can't help buy cry. I am ok with that. I want my heart to stay tender towards those in need and acute to how God would have me respond.

Opportunity: I feel like I have new eyes for seeing opportunities that God has given me. I feel that my prayers, words, and actions have real weight and potential. Little things can make big differences.

These are all things that I am working through with God. I do not want to withdraw from culture here, nor boast that I know or care much more than the average person. I want to find that balance and make the changes that I need to make.

Vulnerable

The other day I was thinking about vulnerability and what that really means, particularly in the life of a Christian.
I realized that it is those who we love and trust the most that have the greatest capacity to hurt us. Why? Because we have opened ourselves up to them: to be loved, rejected, surprised, disappointed, affirmed, encouraged or ignored.
I am not talking about abusive relationship by any means. I am talking about human relationships: parent-child, husband-wife, friend to friend.


Love makes us vulnerable. God-fueled love enables us to remain vulnerable without being victimized or becoming vengeful.

"For God so loved the world" - God truly made Himself vulnerable beyond our capacity of understanding by giving us His Son. Though Jesus was rejected, betrayed, slandered, hated, conspired against, and killed, He remains open, available, and vulnerable to us.

Jesus, who has so completely given of Himself and loved so passionately, has not only paved the way for us to experience His love, but to experience the love of the Father.

No matter what we've done, where we feel we've failed Him, how we've hurt others, God has shown us love and given us mercy if we ask for His forgiveness.



Tidbit of note: the word vulnerable came from a Latin word meaning 'to wound' or 'wounding'

God is good!

God is good! Really, really good!
I just found this post that I had written in October and looking back I can see how God completely has led me through the entire process of going on an adventure with Him, even when I didn't realize it.
It's encouraging to see so many of my hearts longings answered so clearly (I'm sure God had a big part in putting those longings there).

If you know what my summer is like and want to know why I wrote what I did (see above)
Click here-Hungry for Adventure

A Psalm/Prayer

O God, my God, You are the God of
Death to life
Chains to freedom
Brokenness to healing
Guilt to forgiveness.
You are the God who brings breath to dry bones; hope to a people without hope.

Lord, come and bring Your divine exchange to my life.
Awaken things within me that have been sleeping.
Let me wipe away the dust of complacency from my eyes.
Rinse away that which tricks me into thinking I can't come close to you.
Instead give me urgency, vision, and boldness.

Breathe, breathe, breathe into me!
Fill me with Your breath of life.
Let hope saturate my blood and flow through my veins;
always multiplying and bringing life to dead and broken places.

O God, My God, You are the God of nothing into something;
Come and bring Your divine upside downs into my life.

I want to be awake and alive!!!

I'm smitten...well, more than that actually

I've been dating a wonderful, funny, talented man who loves Jesus (!!!) for almost 10 months now and yet some of you don't know anything about him because I don't write about him that much.

Well, I think it's time that I write about our relationship. I've held back in the past for several reasons:

No one wants to hear mushy relationship stuff all the time.

I'm not one of those people who stake their whole personality and life off of another person and wouldn't want to worry anyone.

I'm busy.

With that being said, here I go... complete with timeline appropriate photos.

First, here's some basic info about Nate:

He's a junior theatre major/ religion and philosophy minor who recently discovered his natural ability to interpret Greek and his love of Biblical studies. He's been a camp counselor tons! He's from Norco, CA. He plays drums and guitar. He's tall. He's awkward like me!

Nate and Sam: The Abridged Version

Nate and I had been close friends for two years before we started dating. We dated very briefly freshmen year (about 2 weeks) before I decided that the constant nauseous feeling I had was because I didn't have peace about being in this relationship. We broke up and I said, "I still want to be friends." Which was TRUE. I knew that though I couldn't be in a relationship with him that I had found a really great friend.

After about 2 days of post-break up awkwardness we couldn't handle it and forged ahead in our friendship.

From that point onward we had lots and lots of DTR's (the Sterling term for 'define the relationship'--this means going for a walk or sitting on park benches and talking about where each person is at and how they feel about the other person). Mostly they were caused by Nate really wanting to date me, me liking Nate but not liking Nate, me not wanting to be in a relationship, Nate respecting that, us remaining at our 'just friend' status. The DTR's varied between being hard, annoying, stressful, hilarious, and great.

God used that year and a half or so to draw us closer to Him and mature us. We also grew in our friendship.

In that time we:

Made up lots of inside jokes

Went on Choir tours together (see left: Nate and David-my two favorite guys. Enacting a scene from Baywatch in CA)

Won a swing dance competition

Played in praise band together

Had late night talks in the union

Hung out with my family

Hung out with our friends.

And just had fun!

And the best part is that the core of our relationship is our friendship. This past June we decided to date(there are so many different terms people use-courtship, dating, etc. I think the best way to explain it is that from the start we took our relationship seriously. We felt strongly that it could head towards marriage but still wanted to enjoy 'dating' and getting to know each other even more.) It was amazing to see how God prepared us to be in a deeper relationship with one another.

Nate is a huge blessing in my life. He is a confidant, someone who understands and shares my random sense of humor, and a wild man; he strives to be who God made him to be and won't be tamed by others.

Nate is also a great spiritual leader. He reminds me of the truth when I need to hear it. He prays for me and with me when I am discouraged. He constantly reminds me with his words and actions of God's love and mercy. I'm excited for whatever God has for us! As the famous line from the 80's said it, "The future is so bright, I've got to wear shades."

Here are some more pictures of us:

Something new

Hey blog readers...whoever you may be!

I just added a new link to a website. My friend Molly and I posted this website to get the word out about our senior service project.

We're really excited about it but definitely need your prayer support!

We'll keep updating it as we get information.

Awake '08

Is it Thanksgiving break yet?

I could really use a break.
Last weekend our small singing group, Highland Singers, went on a 4 day tour around eastern KS, mostly the Kansas City area. It was a great time and the best music tour experience I've had thus far. We became close as friends and became tight musically. It was a good tour, but we did miss two days of class and didn't have time to do homework. So I've been playing catch up this week. It's really a scramble sometimes.

This weekend I'm heading up to Kansas City again for our semi-annual trip to the International House of Prayer. I'm excited because a big group is going (25) and many have never been before. Also, I'm not in charge! That is a good feeling, especially when there is some sort of snag with the trip planning. I'm not being held responsible. It is also a hard feeling sometimes because I wish I could just take control and straighten it all out, or go back in time and help my friends (including my roommate and my boyfriend and another good friend) plan for all these snags about a month ago. It is times like this when I realize how much of a greedy power-monger I am. God is teaching me a lot about that. I'm excited for a slight break at one of my favorite places! I'm anticipating the work that God is going to do in these students lives. Some amazing things came out of our past trips.

That is all the updates you get for now.

Hungry for adventure

I don't know what precisely is going on in my heart. It is a random, itching, "somethings about to happen", kind of feeling that rises up in me. The feeling is a hunger for adventure--to do soemthing meaningful, daring, maybe a little weird or stupid looking--for God. The condundrum is "What is God trying to tell me or show me? Where or to what is God leading me?".

I feel the need for a pilgramage. Getting out there--seeing a little bit of the world before the demands of adulthood come down on me--allowing God to take me way out of my comfort zone.

So far this pilgramage has been spiritual. God has been working on my heart intensely, with passion and jealousy for all of my love. Times have been tough, really tough at times. I've cried so much this semester it's nuts. Don't worry, I'm not depressed. It's actually an answer to prayer as I have asked God to soften my heart and to help me allow myself to feel, even when it hurts. I don't want a heart of stone! I've also had amazingly sweet and refreshing times in His presence. God is already taking me on an adventure as He calls me to join Him in what He is doing and where He is going, despite my fears and doubts. I'll have to write more about what God is doing in my heart. Remind me!

But, at the same time, I feel this stirring to go somewhere! I don't know where. I am still praying about it and seeing what God wants to do with my summer.
I don't know what it is. I think partly it's a desire for something different, partly a desire to be radically in love with God, and partly to be more independent and get away to something foreign to everyday life.

I just want this summer to be different. Every summer I end up feeling like my time could've been used better. Since I've gone to school my friends in town have all moved away and I feel isolated from my peers during the summer. I want to spend my time wisely, grow closer to God and be stretched in my faith, and get to know more people my age.

I'm checking out my options and praying about it. We'll see what happens.

Back to School

In 9 days I will return to school for leadership training and orientation planning. It's amazing that the summer is already coming to a close. My summer was not at all what I had expected. The only thing I knew for sure was that I was going to The Call. I thought I would have more time up at the IHOP. I thought I would have more free time. I didn't plan on going to California. I didn't think I would ever be a camp counselor (more to come on that).

Though it wasn't necessarily what was expected it was a really wonderful summer. God taught me a lot about leadership, service, relationships, perseverance, and youth ministry. I know that even the smallest experiences I've had this summer God will use to teach me or help me during the school year.

Next year is going to be so different. I can feel it. I'm going to be an upper class men. The campus will be different (due to the natural ebb and flow of new students and friends who have graduated). I'm in more prominent positions of leadership. I am leading one praise band this year (there are two) and am President over our Praise Band organization. I'm head student chaplain. Part of my job as student chaplain is being a member of the Student Government's executive cabinet which means meetings, helping christian organizations on campus, helping with Wednesday and Sunday chapel services, assessing the spiritual needs of the campus and finding ways to provide for those needs. The other part includes providing leadership, underneath our two campus pastors, for the student chaplain team, leading Bible studies, and whatever else might come up. I'm really excited for this opportunity and desire to honor and follow God's leadership, knowing His heart for this campus.



Aside from titled roles this year will be different as I have two years left and myself and my peers are starting to think about the future. Suddenly the idea of independence and adulthood take on new meanings as they become much more than just moving away from home and going to school. We've got a lot to learn. Also, my best friend of two years, a wonderful and godly man, is now my boyfriend. It will be a fun challenge learning to balance our relationship with all of our responsibilities (he is also a chaplain this year among other things) and honor God with our relationship.

Above all, all these unknowns and unexpected have helped me learn to trust God's perfect leadership. I'm excited to see how and where He will bring me to the "what's" this year.

Thoughts on The Call...a month later

A month ago I was flying into Nashville to meet two friends from school Cayla and Ben. It's amazing to think of all that took place during that one day and all that has happened since. Looking back it all seems so surreal. I know that The Call was a turning point, not only for me but for the Church and the nation, even though the full impact has yet to be seen. It's difficult to even put into words all that I experienced and all that God did but I will try.
The morning of the 7th we got up early and hopped a taxi with a few others from our hotel. We were meeting with thousands of others for a repentance walk. The walk was a 2.7 mile walk down Church Street from the park to the stadium. The focus of the repentance walk was not to point fingers at sinners on our way but to repent for our own sins and for the sins of the Church. Lou Engle said before the march (paraphrase), "The reason we have no voice in our culture is that we are consumed by the same sins as those outside of the Church."
Thousands of people started the day on their faces weeping, interceding, and repenting.

Then we started to walk. The whole walk was done in complete silence and as we started walking through the grass it sounded like rushing water, which reminded me of the passages in scripture about a "voice like many waters." It was so powerful to be united in repentance and prayer as we walked down Church street. As we got closer to the stadium we could hear the music and the voices singing "Holy, Holy, Holy." We walked into the stadium and moved from repentance to praise.

The Call officially started at 10am with corporate repentance and forgiveness. Leaders from various people groups would ask for forgiveness for the sins that group had committed against other groups. For example, white leaders asked for forgiveness from Native Americans and African Americans for the sins committed against them. Once this happened specific ethnic groups were asked to stand and we prayed for our brothers and sisters in Christ. Typically I am not one to cry or like crying but I couldn't help weeping most of the morning. That morning my tears became my repentance, praise, and intercession.

Throughout the rest of the day we would transition from worship, intercession, confession, personal and group prayer, and short lessons on themes of The Call. I received a huge breakthrough and freedom from past sins. I had waited so long to be free from that sin which hurt me and caused injury to other relationships. That was a huge part of what God did in me during The Call. I left feeling free and new.

God also used The Call to remind me who I am in Him and what I am called to do. It was very encouraging.
Another powerful part of the day was corporate communion. We all took communion together and committed ourselves to the Lord.

Worship was also powerful that day. The expression of 'warring in worship' was definitely the case. Since a-capella with 50,000 people is also something I highly recommend. Most of the time we would be gloriously stuck singing "Holy, Holy, Holy!" for long periods of time. I think that when God brings so many together to consecrate themselves to Him that is the most fitting thing to sing.

Just a week or so ago I received another huge breakthrough of feeling God's presence, enjoying being with God, and receiving revelation on the Word again. It's been months, starting maybe a year ago and really intensifying in February. He was faithful to lead me, teach me, and strengthen me during this time. I feel like the verse "I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living" Ps 27:13 was so true. There were so many times where my only choice was to cling to the truth of His word that He would reveal Himself again. He is so good!

P.S. I'll probably post some pictures of the event soon.

I'm back

Hey. I just returned from The Call in Nashville! (California was great by the way). It was one of the most beautiful, powerful, life-changing days I've had in my life. I'm still processing everything. I'll have to give a full update once I journal, reflect, and rest up. Until then I leave you with what happened towards the end of the day (There was a repentance walk at 7am, The Call started at 10 and ended at 10=long day)
Watch:

He wasn't kidding about being Jealous

"Put me like a seal over your heart,

Like a seal on your arm

For love is as strong as death,

Jealousy is as severe as Sheol

Its flashes are flashes of fire,

The very flame of the LORD.

"Many waters cannot quench love,

Nor will rivers overflow it;

If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love,

It would be utterly despised."

Song of Solomon 8:6-7 (NASB)

This verse is one that I have been meditating on recently. This comes from the book Song of Solomon or Song of Songs (your preference). It's a book you don't often hear about in church. There are typically two views about this book- 1.) This is a book about the intimacy and beauty in a marriage. This is to be taken more literally.

2.) This book is an allegory about Christ's love for the Church. Everything in the book stands for something else. It can be taken metaphorically as a believer's walk into deeper intimacy with God.

I think that it's a combo of two. Since God designed earthly marriage to be like the relationship between Christ and the Church (see here) I think that we can look at this book literally but also see past what is obvious and see Christ's love for the church. That being said (wow, really long intro) these are my thoughts on this verse.

First off, it becomes obvious that this love is not romantic-movie-love or fairy-tale love. This is not an average love. This love is like a flame, like the very flame of God. Water's cannot extinguish it. It isn't something that we can control. When it becomes inconvenient or hard we can't merely 'throw water on it', or even throw it into a river, and expect it to go out.

This love doesn't behave in ways we understand or like in our humanity.

It is stronger than death- it last forever and love really has the final word.

It is jealous as Sheol (the grave)- this love won't let us run to other lovers.

This love won't wash away when we feel it is getting too hot.

This love isn't impressed or controlled by our wealth.

Like it says in verse 7 "...If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love it would be utterly despised." It's not something you can buy and own as long as you want. One can never own (or control) love with wealth. Love, however, often call us to give up those things we can buy or 'earn' with our money. It's almost mocking the temporariness of money.

Because love is this way, especially God's love, something like this "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires" (see verses here), three separate times. Because this love is so serious it shouldn't been awakened until the proper time.

This definitely applies to human relationships. It's never good to rush into relationships or marriage before the proper time. (If you want advice on when that is or how you know go find some mature married people).

I also think this applies to our relationship with God. God is the author and perfecter of our faith, not us. He knows at what pace to set us at and where we need to go. He knows what we can handle. That doesn't mean that we don't have our share of responsibility. It's ok to trust God with the process. He's been doing it for a long time.

It especially makes me think of new believers. It's easy to want to teach them everything right away and want them to understand. But it is better to trust God to 'awaken love' and bring them closer to Himself how and when he wants.

Just some thoughts. Not exactly fully formed or anything.

Second verse same as the first

In prep for the call see here .

By the way, the first fast was incredibly successful (in God's eyes). That doesn't mean I didn't mess up sometimes (that's when you push delete and start over). God met me in my hunger. Yay! I pray that He does it again!

Fasting!!!

I am heading to The Call this summer and I am way excited to be partnering with God's heart and interceding for my generation and this nation. Here is some more information about the 40 day fast leading up to The Call. Be sure to check out www.thecall.com for more information. If God lays it on your heart please pray for those who choose to fast, for the grace to fast and press into Jesus, as well as praying for the event itself (they are expecting 100,000 people to come).

---

God has graciously raised up Lou Engle to call America to a 40 day fast. Lou has mobilized thousands of leaders who are committed to this vision as well. All the major Christian TV networks are announcing it to get the word out - it is time for America to fast and pray as a nation. The article below, written by Lou, explains the urgency behind this initiative. The IHOP-KC family is standing with The Call and believers during these 40 days. Please forward this to everyone you know who has a heart for America.
www.fastandpray.com



There are moments in history when a door for massive change opens, and great revolutions for good or evil spring up in the vacuum created by these openings. In these divine moments, key men, women and even entire generations risk everything to become the hinge of history, the pivotal point that determines which way the door will swing.

The rebellious generation of the ’60s seized its moment, and history crashed into the deep abyss of drug addiction, sexual immorality, hatred for authority and a rejection of the law of God. In 1967, there was a culminating and defining moment in that rebellion, when 100,000 young people, ages 15–25 flocked to San Francisco to experience the hippie movement. This mass convergence was sparked by the hit song, “San Francisco” (Wear a Flower in your Hair). Once there, these young adults experimented with LSD, pot, casual sex and Eastern mysticism in what became known as the “Summer of Love.”

When these newly recruited ‘Flower Children’ returned home at the end of the summer, they brought with them new styles and ideas, flooding the cities of the US and Europe with a message that opposed authority and scorned conservative morals. This counterculture rebellion was fueled by music and art, which rapidly shifted global culture.

For 40 years, we have been falling headlong into a black moral morass in America along with the western world. We are reaping the waves of destruction in every sector of our post Christian society. Can America survive another 40 years? We are declaring “NO! A thousand times NO!” Unless a massive spiritual shift occurs at this moment, our children will live under an antichrist system and Godless enculturation that will bring about the demise of America, as we know it.

But God has a prescription for such a massive shift and it is revealed in the power of the great transitional 40-day fast. God, in His sovereign control over the parade of history, delivered the Israelites out of Egypt. Longing to release a moral code that would give foundations for righteousness, for time and eternity, God summoned Moses to a 40-day fast on Mount Sinai. Through this fast, all of history changed and the law of God was delivered from Heaven to Earth. Therefore, if America is going to return to God, it must recover that law again as its foundation for truth.

Elijah, at the height of Jezebel’s cultic dominion over Israel fasted 40 days, broke the spell of Jezebel off of his own life and received a mandate to anoint the next generation. Elijah’s fast unleashed a movement that toppled Jezebel’s regime of hell, which perpetrated the destruction of family, the killing of innocent children, the silencing of the voice of God’s people and the widespread culture of sexual immorality. The fruit of this fast culminated in the utter destruction of Baal worship in Israel.

Also in the fullness of time, the Glorious Gospel era was born when Jesus fasted 40 days and those who sat in darkness saw a great light. Clearly the 40-day fast is Heaven’s great transitional prescription, moving nations from failure to fulfillment of promise. Is it any surprise that when Jesus was to enter into His great sacrifice—where death would be swallowed up in victory—Elijah and Moses appear with Him on the Mount of Transfiguration. All three were together as the 40-day fasters. They presided over the great transitions of history.

When the Israelites were poised to move into the Promise Land, spies were sent out for 40 days. When they returned carrying an evil report, a whole generation was infected with unbelief and they turned their back on the Promise Land. God’s sentence on that generation was “And your sons shall be wanderers in the wilderness for forty years and bear the brunt of your infidelity until your carcasses are consumed in the wilderness. According to the number of the days in which you spied out the land forty days, for each day you shall bear your guilt one year, namely forty years, and you shall know my rejection.” (Numbers 14:33–34) It was 40 years of judgment for 40 days failure.

Conversely, the great prophet Ezekiel received a 40-day prayer assignment for a 40-year failure of Judah’s iniquity. “Lie again on your right side, then you shall bear the iniquity of the house of Judah, forty days I have laid on you a day for each year.” (Ezekiel 4:6) It was clearly 40 days prayer for 40 years of failure.

When Jesus fasted 40 days and was tempted of the devil He quoted from the book of Deuteronomy saying “It is written man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.” And again, “You shall not tempt the Lord thy God” and again, “You shall worship the Lord your God and Him only shall you worship.” Jesus, in His victory over Satan, was quoting the book of Deuteronomy, the portion of scripture delivered by Moses to the generation who failed in the desert. Jesus, in His 40-day fast, was clearly identifying with that passage of scripture and the generation that came out of Egypt. As an intercessor in His 40-day fast, Jesus was fulfilling what a generation had failed in for 40 years.

Forty years are up! Could the Church of America in a 40-day fast deliver a nation out of a 40-year curse? We have scriptural precedent to believe for such a turning! Therefore, we are trumpeting a call to 40 days of fasting like Moses, Elijah, Ezekiel and Jesus. We must bear the iniquity in 40 days of fasting and intercession for the past 40 years of divorcing God in America, embracing a culture of sexual immorality, hedonism, materialism, abortion and the rejection of Christ in public places. But we are also calling for 40 days of fasting and prayer for the greatest outbreak of Kingdom power, in signs and wonders, and the spiritual awakening in America that will collide with this present darkness and topple its cultural dominion over our people. Thousands went on 40-day fasts in 1946 and in 1947, the great healing revivals broke out. In 1948, the Latter Rain outpourings began, Bill Bright and Billy Graham’s ministries were born, and Israel became a nation. Could it be that the 40-day fast preceded this explosion of power by the Spirit? After Jesus’ 40-day fast, the scripture says He returned in the power of the Spirit. Yes the promise of Joel 2 is that after the fast, “I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh…”

Forty years ago, in 1967, the Jesus Movement broke out. A youth revival started on the streets swept across the country, exploding on college campuses and coffee houses. People were being saved everywhere. Now 40 years later, we are crying out for God to do it again, way beyond the Jesus Movement!

In 1967, in a war and obviously by the supernatural hand of God, Jerusalem was taken and once again brought under the control of the state of Israel. This was a monumental signpost in the shifting of eras. The dispensation of the times of the Gentiles was now beginning to shift to the times when Jerusalem will become the last days focus for God’s activity in the Earth. For 40 days, we are joining Israel in a 40-day fast crying out to God that Israel would see their Messiah and they would begin to receive their greatest spiritual awakening since the days of the Apostles.

Brothers and sisters, moments like these come only once in a lifetime. To miss such a moment could mean missing the purpose of God for a generation. The generation that refused to cross over the Jordan did not know that they had only one day to make the decision, and missing that day meant 40 years in the desert.

Even now we are receiving reports that other countries are calling 40-day fasts. Could we be in a Global 40-day season of fasting (like Jesus), to see a global outbreak of light when great darkness is covering the Earth? Beginning the evening of May 28, we are calling two generations to 40 days of fasting and prayer culminating on 7–7–07, the perfection of time. In a massive, national gathering of fasting, intercession, repentance and worship, we seek to declare our desire to remarry the Lord. We want to cross over into the promise land of national revival. We want to break this 40-year curse. May thousands seek God in water, juice and Daniel fasts from May 28 through 7–7–07, The Call in Nashville.
What would happen in America if for 40 days we sealed the electronic cultural sewer that flows nightly into our living rooms and instead, spent our strength seeking the Lord? What if tens of thousands of fathers and mothers across our nation fasted for 40 days repenting and cleansing themselves of inward toleration of sexual immorality, pornography, addiction to food, entertainment and materialism? What if they prayed daily for their spiritual and physical children to see them converted to Christ and freed from rebellion, from addictions, depression and suicide? What if the young generation fasted for 40 days to be cleansed from lust, media addiction and rebellion toward there parents, believing that a double portion of the Holy Spirit would come upon there lives?

Moses fasted 40 days and mentored a spiritual son named Joshua, which means the Lord saves. Elijah fasted 40 days and threw his mantle on a double portion son, Elisha, which means the Lord saves. Also, John the Baptist fasted in the desert and prepared the way for a double portion son named Jesus, which means the Lord saves. Jesus fasted 40 days and unleashed the apostolic glory of the eternal Son of God into the Earth. What if we are preparing a generation for the greatest day of salvation in history? And so, what if tens of thousands of both generations fast together and gather on 7–7–07 for The Call Nashville in LP Field, to cry out to God in a Joel 2 moment for great national returning to the Lord?

The parade of history has brought us into a profound generational landmark, and a great vacuum has opened again. If the church does not seize this moment, Muslims will! Antichrist rage will! Sexual perversion will! Anarchy will! But now is the time for key men and women, even an entire generation to risk everything to become the hinge of history, the pivotal point which determines which way the door will swing in America and in the nations of the Earth. It's 40 Days or 40 Years—seize the day!

We will be launching this fast with a worldwide simulcast on GOD TV on May 26, 2007. For all information on the 40-day fast and The Call Nashville please visit our websites.40 Days for 40 Years

Ponderings of late...

No big ta da or anything. This is what I have been thinking about, studying, praying through.

In the prologue of John the idea of Jesus being the Word and the Light of men is introduced. From there it is elaborated on. (see for yourself here).
Here is an excerpt from my journal regarding Jesus being the Light:
"Personally, the phrase, "The Light has overcome the darkness." has been big for me.
I try to imagine this One in whom there is no darkness. I imagine this holy, inescapable, unstoppable light blasting sin and darkness from me.
I imagine that when we see Him or when He appears that many will shrink (1 John 2:28) from Him, much like when you turn on a light in a dark room where everyone is sleeping. How scary will it be when some look for relief in a shadow and only find light, light, light? When God appears no one can hide in the shadows any longer. Everything is exposed in the Light.

" This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God." John 3:19-21

Another theme I am studying is healing in Jesus ministry.

Some things I am aiming to see are:

• What are the pattern's Jesus established when He healed. (compassion. mercy. faith)
• If Jesus only did what He saw the Father doing (see here) then what does this say about the Father.
• To become familiar with these passages of scripture
• To apply, through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, these things to my life and ministry to others.

Lastly, here is something cool I found in an old journal (from Dec 16th, 2004)

Based on Romans 11:33

"The fact that we can understand the unknowable, search the unsearchable, and discern that which we could never before see is what makes His wisdom and knowledge so rich. It is valuable because we do not have the right to know, the capacity to understand, or the worth in ourselves to deserve the understanding of the things of God, but we can and we do. This is what makes this wisdom and knowledge infinitely valuable to our lives."