After considering deleting this post I decided to go ahead and post it. It's not as eloquent as I want and it barely scrapes the surface of the issue and my feelings. Well, whatever...
God has such a beautiful way of dealing with and moving in the human heart. Recently I have been reviewing one in particular in my own life. It's the concept of being hedged in.
Often times there comes a season in a Christian's walk with God where things seem dry, dull, boring, or distant. It can be a dramatic and painful contrast to seasons where God's presence seems to surround you and worship, prayer, and Bible study grip your heart every time. This is often referred to as a desert season. I have found myself in this place, this season, recently.
When entering this season it is easy to assume ,"I've done something wrong! I better start repenting of every horrible thing I've ever done. That will make this feeling go away," however, though the feeling of distance from God can be from sin, this is often a season of growth. God has bigger purposes than we can imagine.
These seasons are often used to shake us out of our comfort zone, to disillusion us to the things of this life, and to make us realize how much more God has for us. In this wilderness, this dry and barren place, God is enlarging our capacity to love Him. It's another interesting paradox: a barren place is where we can find life and when we mourn for more of God we will be comforted.
These are not seasons without purpose. God knows our hearts. He knows how easily we are distracted and allow ourselves to be distracted. This is where He hedges us in. We try to find satisfaction in human relationships. WALL. We try to numb the ache inside with entertainment. WALL. We try to fill our emptiness with substances. WALL. We try to run. WALL. We search for satisfaction in everything but God and every time we come up empty. This is our gift.
He is calling us to meet Him in this place, where we're boxed in by our own dissatisfaction and finally look to Him.
